What is needed for a wedding in a church: what documents, list of necessary items

Wedding in the Orthodox Church is one of the seven main sacraments, and believers try to observe the rules for it as carefully as possible. Wedding, along with baptism, confirmation, repentance, communion, priesthood and consecration of oil, constitute the center of spiritual life and embody the fullness of a person’s entry into church life. You will read everything that the bride and groom need to know before such an important step as a wedding in our detailed article. It will also be of interest to those who have already performed the sacrament, but want to learn more about it.

How did people think about weddings before?

Even secretly married people, as well as forcibly married people (this also happened), were almost impossible to debunk. Indeed, in order for such a marriage to be considered invalid before heaven, certain conditions had to be met. So in the case of a secret wedding, those around them had no choice but to come to terms with the independence of the newlyweds.

A record of the ceremony was made in the Church books, everything was recorded according to the words of those getting married, without presenting supporting documents. For some people, church records were almost the only documents in their lives, confirming birth, baptism and wedding.

Over time, in the raging passions of revolution and atheism, the wedding ceremony practically became a thing of the past. Churches collapsed. Communism swept across the country in sweeping strides, Stalin's cult of personality crushed the people's way of life. Accordingly, all religious celebrations were prohibited and many church sacraments were also banned.

The church lost its powers and no longer had the right to fill out any documentary paperwork.

A person who decided at that time to witness his marriage before God risked a lot. He could have been expelled from the party, but it is worth noting that being a “non-communist” in those days was not only shameful, but also dangerous. In addition to expulsion from the party, a person was also threatened with dismissal from work so that church “opium” would not spread in the team. That is why people grew up who could not even imagine such a ceremony as a wedding in the Orthodox Church. This, it must be said, did not have a very beneficial effect on post-revolutionary society.

Getting married and getting divorced has become very easy. A couple who wanted to live together was required to submit an application to the registry office and come to register their marriage at the appointed time. Printing, painting, and a new family was born.

How can they be used later?

During the wedding ceremony, the priest reads a prayer, the power of which is transferred to the wedding candles. Therefore, they are used during special family events:

• at the birth of children;
• on wedding and wedding anniversaries;
• during a marital quarrel, family discord;
• during forced separation (distant or long business trip of one of the spouses);
• in case of illness of one of the spouses or children.

Priests recommend lighting ritual attributes during major Orthodox holidays, especially the Great Twelve.

But just lighting a candle is not enough. You need to read a prayer, turning to the Lord with bright, warm words. The power of burning candles will double if you place them in front of the icons that took part in the ritual. The number of lit accessories does not matter. The spouses are a single unit, so you can use either one or both candles.

When turning to the Lord with a request to help save a family or heal a sick person after achieving the desired, you need to thank the Lord with the prayers for the help provided.

If ritual attributes were damaged during storage, they can still be used by connecting them with tape or lighting broken candles. After the death of one of the spouses, wedding items are given to the church for burning, or one of the candles is placed in the coffin of the deceased.

The most important

You need to understand whether the desire to bind yourself with unbreakable bonds comes from the soul. Does your couple understand that such a ceremony imposes obligations on those getting married that must be fulfilled in this life until death? Thanks to the prayers read during the wedding, the couple becomes forever united. It will be very difficult to debunk such a union; many conditions must be met, proof that you cannot be husband and wife, and wait for the Metropolitan’s permission.

Unfortunately, many newlyweds do not understand the seriousness of this sacrament. That is why weddings are held as a kind of fashionable element of marriage. They do not hesitate to greet the newlyweds at the exit from the church, pouring champagne on the bride to the joyful and completely inappropriate cries at the church gates: “Bitter!”

And only after fully realizing the responsibility for such an important step do you have the right to think about what is needed for a wedding in a church, what inviolable dogmas exist and what items need to be purchased for such an exciting and serious ceremony.

Wedding scenario after church

In order to bring the holiday as close as possible to the canonical one, it is recommended to adhere to ancient Orthodox traditions and celebrate the wedding correctly.

It is better to go to the wedding and back by different roads.

After church, the newlyweds are met at the restaurant by their parents with bread and salt. The couple gets out of the car, stepping on a spread towel.

At the festive table, the husband and wife sit on a bench rather than on separate chairs, which symbolizes their life together.

The newlyweds can dance this evening only together or with their parents.

The host of the holiday can hold harmless games and competitions to entertain the guests: “Handkerchief”, “Guess the melody”, “Stream” or “Third Odd”.

The beginning and end of the holiday are celebrated with choral church singing.

Father will not marry you if...

• You are related down to the fourth generation.
• One of you is an atheist who is present at the ceremony only to please his other half.
• Do not try to get married if you have already gone through this ritual in your life and are not now debunked.
• Spiritual kinship will also not allow you to become spouses.
• Some of you adhere to a different religion.
• One of the couple has mental disorders.
• In Russia, people will also not get married if there are no documents permitting this action.

It is useful to find out in advance what documents are needed for a wedding in a church. Typically, the required documents are, of course, passports and a marriage certificate. Since the revolution, the registry office authorities have remained authorized to issue marriage documents. Therefore, no one will marry you without stamps in your passport.

Wedding in Russia

Previously, the wedding ceremony was the only opportunity to get married, but after the revolution in 1917, this responsibility was taken over by the registry offices, and the church lost its influence. People began to get married again in Russia quite recently, in the 90s of the last century, and every year this ancient tradition is gaining more and more popularity. But nevertheless, Russia is a secular state, so the church depends on state laws. Therefore, a marriage concluded in the registry office, but without a wedding, is considered legal. And a wedding without state registration will not only be considered illegal, but not a single priest will perform this ritual.

What is needed for a wedding in a church: a list of necessary attributes

1. The image of the Savior and the image of the Mother of God. It’s good if your family has preserved these icons, you can (even preferably) take them. If not, then it is worth purchasing in advance from the church.
2. Wedding candles, buy them in advance at the church kiosk.
3. Wedding rings for the bride and groom.
4. Wedding towel.
5. Towel, napkins for candles (from burning drops of wax).
6. It may well be that before a church wedding you need to make a donation to the temple. Usually the donation price is fixed.
7. Pectoral crosses. You are baptized people, so crosses should be on you.
8. Cahors, wine used in church sacraments.
9. Loaf (optional).

The bride must wear a white dress during the ceremony. Covered shoulders, a non-transparent dress, discreet makeup - this is what you need for a wedding in an Orthodox church. And even if a lady of very advanced years is getting married, this does not change matters. Pay attention to the bride's manicure; it should not be flashy.

The “youngest” age of the bride must be at least sixteen years old. The groom can only get married at the age of eighteen. The most mature bride who will be allowed to get married in the church is a lady who has reached the age of sixty years. The most “mature” man who will be allowed to get married should not be older than seventy.

Why is a wedding necessary?

In the life of a Christian, God's blessing is of great importance. We pray in the morning, before going to bed, and on Sunday we dedicate the day to God by visiting temple. We take the blessing of the priest for every good deed. The death of a Christian is also associated with prayer . Moreover, believers want to receive God’s blessing for such an important event as marriage. After all, Orthodox Christians are chaste and want to have only one companion for life.

God's blessing for marriage is given in the Sacrament of Wedding, in which the priest reads prayers for mutual love and understanding of the spouses, for the gift of children. For a religious person, civil registration cannot be fully perceived as marriage. He needs the Sacrament to understand that a family has been created.

Rings: which ones are needed and what they mean

There is still debate about what kind of rings are needed for a church wedding. Previously, the groom put a silver ring on his future wife's finger, but the bride put a gold ring on her groom's finger. Only smooth rings, without engravings or decorations, were accepted for wedding rings. Because the ring is a symbol of the endless love of a married couple, and the smoothness of this product meant that the newlyweds’ path through life would be as smooth as the surface of the rings. But sometimes people made engravings on the inside of the ring, this was only allowed if they engraved some words from a prayer to protect the marriage.

Today, young people put gold rings on each other’s fingers, sometimes with designs decorated with precious stones. Although if the ring is very elaborate, the priest may refuse to marry you. Therefore, try to adhere to the regulations. Simple wedding rings that you exchanged at the time of registration are perfect for a wedding.

Why go to church before the wedding?

When preparing yourself for the Sacrament of Wedding, you need to visit the church and talk to the priest. The church minister will tell you what your couple needs to do before getting married in church. Usually the need for fasting, the Sacrament of Confession and the Sacrament of Communion is stipulated. The priest will also coordinate the wedding day with you. It will not be possible to get married on any chosen day; there are also some Orthodox dogmas for such a ceremony. It will clarify for you whether witnesses are needed for a wedding in a church and what to do if for some reason there are still no witnesses. Different situations happen in life, in some churches they accommodate the newlyweds and provide people who help during the ceremony and hold crowns over the heads of the bride and groom.

Carrying out the sacrament of wedding

Engagement

• According to the traditions of the Orthodox Church, betrothal takes place before the ceremony. It is evidence of the readiness of the future spouses to say all their vows to each other in the face of the Lord God.
• And the place of engagement was not chosen by chance: the groom takes the bride from the Creator himself. Therefore, at the beginning of the ceremony, the celebrants stand near the doors of the temple, and the priest is inside. Then he leads the newlyweds inside - this step means that the engaged are going to the source of a new married life in the face of the Lord God, just as Adam and Eve walked in ancient times.
• After this, the priest blesses and censes the newlyweds and hands them pre-lit candles as a sign of commemorating the pure and bright feelings that the newlyweds feel for each other. Candles symbolize the purity of future spouses, to whom the grace of God descends.
• The priest offers prayers to the Almighty for those getting married. Young people should behave with utmost respect for the temple and the sacrament of weddings, they should behave appropriately. If the couple behaves inappropriately, the ceremony will not bring happiness: the bride and groom are obliged to sincerely and with all their hearts pray to God and ask for help from Him.

Rings are a sign of an indestructible and sustainable union between spouses.

• The priest puts rings on the couple for the wedding in the church after reading all the prayers. Before putting on, the position of the rings is also not accidental: they are placed on the right side of the holy throne, as if close to Jesus Christ. It is believed that during the time the rings touch the consecrated place, they absorb God's blessing.
• The exchange of rings between future spouses is a symbol of the fact that the young husband intends to sacrifice everything for the sake of his beloved, and the young wife will be forever faithful to her beloved. The ring exchange ceremony is repeated three times. The priest repeats the prayers to the Lord God. At this stage, the engagement is completed.

Wedding

• The sacrament of the wedding begins when the newlyweds stand in the middle of the temple, holding lit wedding candles in their hands. A priest with a censer passes in front of them, showing that the young people will walk through life in harmony with the commandments of the Lord God, and their good deeds will be visible to the Lord.

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• The newlyweds stand on a towel spread on the floor and again prove their desire to enter into a union in the face of the Almighty. It is imperative to mention the sincerity of the desire and that it comes from a pure heart. It is advisable that future spouses do not previously give consent to marriage to anyone.
• Afterwards, the most important ceremony of the sacrament of wedding begins - this is the process of sanctifying the marriage by God's grace. The first prayer is addressed to Jesus Christ. The priest in it asks the Lord God for a calm family life, love in marriage, prosperity and children for the newly-made married couple. The next two prayers are addressed to the Holy Trinity. One is about the abundance and fertility of marriage, and the second contains a request to the Holy Trinity to bind the newlyweds into one and combine them.
• Then the priest takes the crown, first baptizes the future spouse with it and presents the icon of the Savior, it must be kissed. Next, he takes another crown in his hands and baptizes his wife with it, bringing her the icon of the Mother of God to kiss. After the ceremony, the newlyweds await the blessing of the Lord God (the most important minute of the wedding sacrament). The priest blesses those getting married on behalf of the Creator, and a prayer is said three times. During this period, all people who are in the temple are obliged to pray to the Lord God in order to increase the power of the priest’s prayer.

The sacrament of marriage has been sealed. Having blessed the marriage, the priest, represented by the Temple, made the young people the founders of the newly formed Christian union, showing them the path to the Kingdom of God.

Completion

• The priest, concluding the ceremony with the reading of the Lord's Prayer, indicates to the newlyweds that they should bow their heads under the crowns, thus showing their admiration and unshakable trust in the Lord God. The priest brings a cup of wine to the young family, which is blessed for the joy of their union. The wine is a reminder of the miracle accomplished by Jesus Christ. The husband and wife each take three sips from the cup of wine.
• The priest then takes the right hand of the husband and the right hand of the wife, places them side by side, covering them with his own hand, thus transferring the spouse into the hands of the spouse on behalf of the Temple, uniting their union forever. The young people walk around the lectern three times, announcing to everyone about the lifelong joint procession that begins from this moment. The newlyweds need to remember about the common cross; from now on they will bear it together.
• At the end of the round, the priest releases the newlyweds from their crowns and pays respects on behalf of the Temple. Next, the priest prays to the Lord, asking Him to accept crowns that have not absorbed filth and vice in His Kingdom. When reading the subsequent prayer, the newlyweds are required to bow their heads and pray to the Holy Trinity. After reading the prayer, the newlyweds kiss, showing others about their pure, mutual and sincere love.
• According to Orthodox tradition, the newlyweds then approach the gate, near which the husband must kiss the icon of the Savior, and the wife must kiss the icon of the Mother of God, after which the newlyweds change places. The priest also brings the cross to the spouses for kissing and hands over the icons.
• The sacrament of the wedding is considered over, the newlyweds can celebrate their union with a festive dinner. It should be remembered that this is not a wedding feast, and crazy dancing, a huge amount of alcoholic drinks and loud music are inappropriate here. Newlyweds are required to behave in a mannered manner and as calmly as possible. If the newlyweds want to have fun, then they should have a wedding feast on another day.

Who are the witnesses? Who should not be used as a witness at a wedding?

Witnesses at a church wedding ceremony are people who act as guarantors. That is, these people vouch for your union before God. They are also obliged to help in your married life with advice in case of conflicts and other difficulties.

Allowed to be witnesses:

• For a married couple, especially if the couple has been married for many years, and their family for you is an indicator of a good and faithful family.
• Relatives from the bride's and groom's side. Here, keep in mind one small nuance: these witnesses do not have the right to enter into a church-sanctified marriage after they were guarantors at your wedding. This is explained by the fact that, having undergone the ritual, these people have already become spiritual relatives. And the wedding of spiritual relatives is strictly prohibited!

You cannot be witnesses at a wedding:

• The couple you wanted to take as witnesses is now divorced. Since people who failed to preserve their marriage bonds will not be able to teach the young anything worthwhile, but will only cause harm.
• The witness-witness couple live in cohabitation, that is, they have not even registered their marriage with government agencies.
• When planning to invite a couple as witnesses, inform them that in order to get married in a church, they need to provide their marriage certificate.

The meaning of a wedding ceremony: what you need to know

A wedding is not just a beautiful ceremony, but an ancient church rite, when the newlyweds become part of the sacred world of the Lord, and God always protects this family. From this moment on, the spouses and the creator are inseparable on earth and in heaven. This family is now a special unit of society, where the main thing is mutual sacrifice, proper upbringing of children and the spiritual growth of husband and wife until their transition to Heaven. That is, married people are now responsible before God for their union and attitude towards each other.

This important step must be carefully considered. A clear understanding is needed that people will be able to walk the earthly path together, despite various life trials. Spouses should have enough love and patience until the very end.

Responsibilities of witnesses

Witnesses perform several functions during the ceremony, here are the most important of them:

• Hold crowns over the heads of the young.
• Help with wedding rings, present them during the ceremony.
• Lay a towel under the feet of the young people in front of the lectern.
• During the three-fold procession, walk together with the bride and groom.

A wedding in a church takes place over a period of forty minutes or more. It is worth warning your guarantors in advance that the crowns are very difficult to hold.

How to celebrate a wedding? Congratulations on your wedding. What do you give for a wedding?

The sacrament of wedding takes place joyfully and solemnly. It is customary to continue the celebration at the table after the end of the sacrament. But since a spiritual holiday is being celebrated, the feast should be modest and quiet. From this point of view, it is better to separate the wedding day and the wedding day in time.

In congratulations on a wedding, they usually wish for salvation for the soul, congratulate on God's blessing, wish to live happily ever after, take care of each other, love and cherish. They wish you peace and mental balance. It is also better to give spiritual gifts, for example, icons or spiritual books.

What else do you need to know for a wedding ceremony in the Orthodox Church?

• During the wedding ceremony, the newlyweds should not look back at people, nor should they look at the image. You need to look only at the clergyman so as not to miss important points and be able to answer questions on time.
• It is imperative to cross yourself only with your right hand. In the Orthodox faith, it is customary to address a priest with the word “father.”
• Under no circumstances should you be late for the sacrament of marriage! Think over this point and better enter the church a little early (about 20 minutes).
• Since a wedding is a fairly lengthy process, think about and take care of your shoes. Do not wear tight high-heeled pumps. Let your shoes be comfortable so as not to distract you from good thoughts and spiritual joy during the ceremony.
• Turn off your phones while visiting the temple.
• During the ceremony, the female part of the guests should be on the left side of the room, the male part, respectively, on the right.
• Issues related to photo and video shooting are discussed in advance.
• During the ceremony, you are not supposed to have your hands in your pockets or hold hands.

Folk signs

Since ancient times, the wedding ceremony has been considered a mysterious event, which is shrouded in many beliefs. Now many traditions have been forgotten, but a few signs remain that must be observed for the blissful life of the young.

Wedding ceremony

• If the ring falls during the engagement, this is an omen of the dissolution of the union soon, or a serious illness or death of the owner of the ring. In order to ward off trouble from yourself, after the wedding, order a magpie for Health and adhere to a strict fast.
• Under no circumstances should a towel placed under your feet be thrown away - it is a symbol of the newlyweds’ life path. You need to put the towel in a secluded and safe place so that no stranger will jinx your happiness.
• The same applies to candles; you need to take them with you and store them next to the towel. Such a candle should be lit at the time of difficult childbirth, or a serious illness of any family member.

The wedding night

There are also many rituals associated with the first wedding night.

Rituals associated with the sacrament have come to us from time immemorial.

• For the newlyweds, the bed is prepared exclusively by the groom's mother. No strangers should enter the room to avoid unintentional damage or the evil eye;
• The groom's mother should inspect the bed itself and the place near it. If you find needles, pins, grains, scraps of hair or wool, as well as any other objects that are not appropriate here, it is worth taking the newlyweds away from this place - this could be a lining planted with the aim of destroying relationships and the evil eye. Prepare an ordinary mattress on the floor - the newlyweds will endure one night, and the machinations of ill-wishers against the young family will be ineffective;
• You need to sprinkle the newlyweds’ bed with holy water and read a strong conspiracy:

Signs for a wedding

• During the wedding process between a young couple, no one is allowed to pass, otherwise the family will be destroyed.
• The wedding crown must be worn on the head. If the crown is not worn, the marriage is not valid before the Lord.
• For a long and happy life, it is necessary to do this at the same time during the wedding when blowing out the candles.

For the best and correct choice, please visit several cathedrals before deciding which one you want to be married in.

What needs to be done before the wedding?

So, how to properly prepare for a wedding? The couple must receive communion before the wedding. This can be done the day before or on the wedding day itself at the morning liturgy (morning service). The wedding usually takes place immediately after the liturgy.

You need to prepare for communion: fast for 3 days, read special prayers - Follow to Holy Communion, confess. Here is the answer to the question, is it necessary to fast before a wedding? If the newlyweds will take communion on the wedding day, then fasting before the wedding (more precisely, before communion) is necessary.