“Divorce” - how much has merged in this sound for a woman’s heart. How much resonated in him. Almost a classic. Divorce is always a tragedy. For a woman who is “programmed” for a family, this is a doubly tragedy. What is divorce a month after the wedding - a tragedy or a farce? Let's figure it out.
For divorce one or two months after the wedding, of course, a very good reason is required. And its roots should be sought in the previous, premarital life. If you look with a cold, detached gaze, they lie on the surface. What are the typical situations when love does not stand the test of living together?
Misalliance or unequal marriage
For example, if a young and beautiful girl, but in need of a livelihood, marries a wealthy and influential, but old man. And before the wedding he says to himself: “Come on, I’ll live somehow, because thousands of people live like this. I can do it too." But the old man turns out to be “wind up.” Having tasted fresh young delights, he not only does not die from an excess of feelings, but also begins to demand “the continuation of the banquet” with a regularity that a young stallion would envy. It is quite logical that not every girl is able to withstand this. In the end, she understands that money, of course, is an important part of life, but by no means the main one. The result is a divorce follows, quite possibly a month after the wedding.
Why do couples get divorced before their first anniversary?
According to Russian statistics, divorce occurs in 65% of marriages after a year of family relationships. Until recently, a husband and wife glowing with mutual feelings were planning a future together. Now everything has changed - the spouses not only don’t like each other, they can no longer stand each other. In more than 70% of cases, applications for divorce are filed by young wives a year after the wedding. There may be a lot of factors influencing such a decision, but psychologists still identify the most common ones.
Unplanned pregnancy
The initial reason for the marriage was the girl’s unplanned pregnancy. We are talking not only about a casual connection that entailed consequences, but also about the romantic stormy passion of young people. The guy and the girl dreamed of a joint family future, but not now, later, when they finish their studies and get on their feet. At one point, their plans changed the notorious two stripes. Yes, in the future, young people wanted to have children together, but not so early. However, the job is done, the wedding is just around the corner and future parents enthusiastically look at photos of happy families, anticipating the joy of fatherhood and motherhood.
At first, they like family life - the newlyweds go on a honeymoon, spend a lot of time together and no longer depend on their parents. When a child is born, a beautiful fairy tale turns into a sleepless life. In fact, it turns out that the birth of a baby is not only love and joy, but also constant care. There is a catastrophic lack of time for yourself and your spouse, as well as money, and sometimes you cannot do without the help of your parents, whether they like it or not.
Marriage of two overly emotional people
One story is fresh in my memory when 2 famous athletes (we will not name their last names, perhaps the reader himself will guess who we are talking about here) dated for quite a long period before marriage. And this period was not strewn with only roses. Possessing a violent temperament and pronounced leadership qualities, the young people met and then separated. However, their passion was so strong that even living apart, they still could not stand it and restored the relationship. Eventually, the couple got married. But their happiness was short-lived - soon after the birth of the child, the young people divorced. They ended up being married for less than a year, just a few months.
Marriage of two people who are not ready for marriage
Or another example - very young and very in love people who, not only have never lived together, but do not even imagine what living together is. Love is of course good, but besides love there are a lot of other factors that accompany this feeling when people get married. One of these factors has a name as short as a moment and as strong as a rock, since many not only young, but also experienced married couples have broken up against it. And this factor is called everyday life. There is also a financial question here - who contributed how much to the general budget, and who spent how much. Here is the question of the distribution of household responsibilities. And if a couple has been dating for a long time, and the first, most vivid feelings have passed, then having entered into marriage with “open” eyes, they can suddenly see that their partner is somewhat “parasitic” on them. In this case, misunderstanding or even divorce is inevitable. And quite likely - already a month after the wedding.
Quick divorce after marriage
There are many reasons why young people do not want to live together immediately after marriage, and they are individual for each couple. After all, before the wedding and on the wedding day everything was fine, the bride and groom love each other, and no one even thinks about getting a divorce. But even such wonderful moments cannot guarantee a long and happy life after registration. Problems may arise suddenly, family relationships will crack and the reasons for divorce a month after registration may be:
- young people cannot get along;
- betrayal of one of the spouses, which became known;
- a fictitious marriage concluded for certain purposes;
- significant age difference - one of the spouses is much younger than the other.
According to existing legislation and the Family Code of the Russian Federation, there is no clear indication of the time that spouses must live together before filing documents for divorce. This can be done even the day after the wedding. Mandatory documents for this procedure are a marriage certificate, passports of the husband and wife, a receipt for payment of the state fee. When one of the spouses is against separation, the plaintiff can file an application with the court.
The legislation of the Russian Federation prohibits divorce a month after marriage at the request of the husband in the event of the wife’s pregnancy and if the couple has a young child under one year old. With this prohibition, the law protects a woman and provides her with the opportunity to receive financial protection during a period when, for obvious reasons, she cannot earn money herself.
Treason
Another factor leading to a quick divorce is banal - infidelity. Sometimes a woman is so carried away by a man that she does not immediately notice that her chosen one is a male. There are many men in life who will not let a single skirt pass them by. As a result, the woman learns with surprise and disappointment that she is not playing the first violin in the orchestra, but... She plays along. A deceived woman who knows her worth will never tolerate this. Do you like to ride? Love and ride. Well, I mean, roll. Sausage.
The crisis of the first year after marriage - divorce?
Family crises are special moments in the life of a family, marked by aggravation of relationships.
Despite the fact that crises pose a certain danger to the existence of the family and can lead to divorce, they are nevertheless a necessary and very important stage that allows one to move to a new level of relationships.
The first year after the wedding is considered the most dangerous, as it is associated with the adaptation of young spouses to each other, loss of illusions and disappointment.
- Psychologists highlight different facets of the first family crisis. There is, for example, a so-called territorial conflict, which is caused by the partners’ distrust of each other . Mistrust, in turn, deprives them of a sense of internal security.
- The distribution of roles and the determination of the leader of the family is also one of the reasons for divorce during the first year of married life. When both spouses are leaders by nature, the struggle for leadership in the family can be especially intense. But the exact opposite situation may arise when none of the spouses wants to take responsibility and make important decisions. This situation arises when both spouses are characterized by infantilism. Before marriage, they were accustomed to relying on the authority of their parents, who made all important decisions for them.
- Financial problems are another facet of the crisis of the first year of life. Conflicts may arise due to leadership in financial matters, due to the distribution of the family budget.
- Sexual disharmony can also cause divorce in the first year of marriage. Dissatisfaction with a partner and hushing up problems only increase tension in the family and aggravate other problems.
To survive the crisis of the first year after marriage, spouses must show maximum patience, learn to talk and negotiate, not hush up their problems, but discuss them openly and find compromise solutions.
How the young couple cope with these tasks determines how strong their marriage will be and whether they can safely survive all subsequent family crises.
When spouses fail to find a compromise solution and the conflict puts the family on the brink of divorce, it makes sense to seek help from a psychologist. Working with a psychologist will help you cope with the first difficulties and better understand each other, find constructive solutions and, ultimately, save the family.
If you have already experienced the crisis of the first year, check out other reasons for divorce that will help lead to the destruction of a marriage in 10 and 20 years.
Imaginary and real pregnancy
But not only men can be weird. Sometimes a woman’s desire to get married is so great (especially if the man is good-looking and also wealthy) that she is ready for all sorts of tricks in order to stake out a tasty morsel for herself and become a legal wife. And it doesn’t matter that the young man may have a girlfriend. It doesn’t matter - the end justifies the means. Or so - let's pave the way to the kingdom of freedom FOR ourselves. Well, or if there are other spectacular parts of the body - with them.
The technology of fooling... that is, excuse me, each girl has her own seduction. The only trouble is that in this story the “hunter” is interested either in the process itself or in the result, but the “victim” herself is of little interest. And even then, at best, at the first stage.
However, if a woman has a bright and attractive appearance or charisma, she often achieves her goal. If a man is not very morally stable, then within a few days after a stormy night he may find out that he will soon become a father. Well, or “will become.” In this case, it is not the truth that is important, but the informational occasion. The girl’s logic, even if she is not pregnant, is also clear - if the relationship continues, then the pregnancy will not matter.
But if the wedding has already ended, and it turns out that there is either no pregnancy, or the timing does not really coincide, the man understands. that he was, to put it mildly, misled. And a deceived man is sometimes no less cruel than a deceived woman. An instant divorce follows, even a month after the wedding.
Did not get along
It also happens that a month after the wedding, a guy and a girl, who previously only met and saw each other for 3-4 hours a day, find themselves in a situation where they see each other constantly. And at some point they realize that all common themes have been exhausted, and their vision of future life and character traits are diametrically opposed. And further time spent together turns into torture - they have nothing more to talk about, nothing to do together, they are strangers. In this example, a hasty marriage is also followed by a quick divorce.
Deadline for reconciliation
There are many reasons why family relationships deteriorate and then separation may follow - it could be the betrayal of one of the spouses, difficult relationships, new love, domestic problems and much more. If one member of the family is satisfied with this state of affairs, then the second spouse will not put up with this and will file for divorce. But at the court hearing, the defendant may ask for reconciliation or try to correct the current situation.
In this case, judges, guided by the articles of the Family Code of the Russian Federation, can offer the married couple a period of up to three months for reconciliation. Such a decision cannot be appealed; the parties will be given summonses for the next meeting. During this time, the defendant can correct mistakes, change the situation in the family, and if he succeeds, at the next hearing the couple may not be divorced. If the parties have not reconciled within the appointed time, the court will divorce them in accordance with current legislation.
Divorce a month after the wedding can occur for various reasons; spouses need to weigh and think about everything before making such a decision, and if it is inevitable, try to separate peacefully.
He turned out to be a swindler
It happens that marriage takes place a month after meeting. And sometimes faster. For example, a girl is so fascinated by the advances of a young man that she is ready to go to the ends of the world with him. He is also ready - but as it turns out, not with her, but with her money or gold jewelry. This story is as old as time. But in this case, a divorce a month after the wedding is a real blessing for the girl. Because the further you go, the worse it could get.
How long does the process take?
The duration of the divorce process is individual and depends on possible nuances, even if it is a divorce a month after the wedding. If the parties reach mutual understanding and maintain good relations, the process will be quick. In cases where division of jointly acquired property is necessary, or there are minor children in the family, a quick divorce will not be possible.
Divorce proceedings, according to the Family Code of the Russian Federation, are carried out in the following state authorities:
- Civil registry office - here marriage registration can be dissolved only between those spouses who have reached a common agreement, they do not need to divide joint property, they do not have minor children;
- Courts - here they will be able to grant a divorce to a husband and wife who have property claims against each other and cannot decide with whom children under 18 years of age will live. If you have all the necessary documents, they can be divorced within three months from the date of filing the application.
Even if the newlyweds decided to divorce a month after the wedding, but during this time they managed to acquire joint property, or the wife provides a pregnancy certificate, they will have to come to terms with the fact that the process will not take place quickly, and for its successful completion they need to find a good family lawyer right.
The purpose of marriage is registration or citizenship
Another type of quick divorce occurs for, so to speak, natural reasons - that is, when your marriage was not built on love and was not concluded for the purpose of creating a family, but for the purpose of registering a place of residence in a particular city or for the sake of citizenship of any a certain country. True, in the latter case, in the event of a hasty divorce, you will not acquire citizenship. But you really can have problems.
In any case, I would like to wish the young spouses long and beautiful love. Based on strong feelings, mutual respect and compromise. Love is a beautiful feeling. But everything beautiful is usually very fragile and needs to be taken care of.
