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Parents who have provided help and care to their children since infancy also need support and attention.
The current family legislation of most countries, including the Russian Federation, imposes an obligation on parents to support their children, both minors and disabled adults. In turn, the RF IC does not provide for responsibilities for minor children as such. Their existence is only assumed in the form of counter-responsibilities of parents, which cannot be said about adult children. The responsibilities of adult children to support their parents are clearly formulated and reflected in Article 87 of the RF IC.
Disabled parents
Parents who have provided help and care to their children since infancy also need support and attention. First of all, this concerns parents who, in accordance with the law, are recognized as:
- Persons of retirement age. Today these are women 55 years and older and men 60 years and older;
- Persons with disabilities of groups I or II.
In rare cases, a disabled parent of group III may apply for financial support if, due to his disability, the latter cannot find a paid job, which is recommended for him by a medical report.
And the RF IC, establishing the obligations of adult children to support their parents, is primarily aimed at protecting the rights of disabled elderly parents.
What happens when aging parents and their children live together
When old parents live with their children, it is quite a difficult test for everyone. Different generations have their own needs, habits and rhythm of life. Parents need to be constantly looked after; they need someone's presence. Accordingly, children are tied to home and cannot build their lives normally.
Often an old person becomes incapacitated . He begins to exist at a primitive level, so it becomes difficult to establish contact with him. No matter how old we are, our parents raised and educated us, so there is a feeling that our parents are higher on the hierarchical ladder. In old age, parents behave like children, which complicates relationships between generations. As a result, all this leads to a change in the attitude of loved ones towards them, especially those who look after them.
One woman spent many years caring for her mother, who could not walk and was constantly in bed. Although she herself had three adult children who lived separately with their families. Then the woman lost her husband. She was constantly housebound because she could not leave an elderly woman alone in the apartment for more than 3-4 hours. Her mother lived a long time, despite her illness. With age, the sick mother became aggressive, embittered towards the whole world, although she had been kind to everyone all her life. This can be explained by the development of senile insanity . In addition, many older people perceive old age as a death sentence.
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Parental cruelty (physical, psychological violence) is scary. Old sick parents can behave aggressively, and the older they are, the more aggressive they become . Elderly parents can insult their children and attack them with their fists. It all ends in scandal. Children, despite their mature age, respond to their parents with the same aggression.
Let's face it, our parents are getting old, and of course we want to show care and look after them. Our parents raised us and also took care of us when we were little. But still there is a way to cope with parental aggression - to adapt to the current situation . In other words, when your parents start fighting, go to another room or out of the house for a few hours.
Obligation of children to support parents
The obligations of adult children to support their parents arise from the counter-obligation imposed on parents to support their children under 18 years of age, and in some other cases that are exceptions. Theoretically, these counter-responsibilities should be fulfilled on a voluntary basis, since the very institution of family presupposes mutual understanding, support, including material, care, etc.
But it does not always turn out that parents voluntarily fulfill their parental duty, and it is not always the case that adult, able-bodied children want to fulfill their responsibilities to the parents who raised them, even if they are elderly, and their age has already exceeded 70 years, and provide for themselves and according to the laws of biology, they cannot provide adequate service.
When children do not consciously support their parents, the legal mechanism for protecting the rights of parents comes into play. The law and the RF IC in particular oblige not only to show care towards disabled parents, but also to provide them with financial support. In this case, the financial condition of the able-bodied child is not taken into account.
Disabled parents may not always qualify for financial assistance from their children. To assign child support, it must be established that the parents are in need of financial assistance. This need is usually confirmed when:
- Parents do not receive a pension;
- The size of the pension received by parents is small, for example, below the established minimum subsistence level.
The RF IC provides for the obligation of children to support their parents for the following categories of children:
- Adults and able-bodied;
- Adults and disabled people whose parents have been recognized in court as needy;
- Minor children who have income and have voluntarily accepted obligations to support their parents financially.
In what situations do children have the right not to pay child support?
The law provides for a number of exceptions that allow children not to pay financial assistance to their needy parents. They can be relieved of the need to support their parents in the following cases:
- The court found that the parents withdrew from fulfilling their parental responsibilities
- Parents were previously deprived of parental rights
- Parents are in the care of an organization or a citizen (citizens), for example, a parent has entered into an agreement providing for his lifelong support at the expense of this organization or citizen
- Parents live free of charge in homes for the disabled and elderly or some other inpatient social service organizations
The procedure for collecting alimony from children
The RF IC gives several options for resolving the issue of children maintaining their parents:
- Voluntary out-of-court;
- Judicial.
The first involves concluding an agreement. The form of the agreement is arbitrary and contains the procedure for providing assistance. An agreement is signed by two parties, one with children and the other with parents, in a number equal to the number of parties to the agreement. Notarization is not mandatory, but it will not be superfluous either. This method is also suitable for taking on child support obligations by a minor child who, despite the age group from 14 to 17 years, has his own independent income and shows conscientiousness towards his parents, helping them and their maintenance.
The second option is prescribed in the law for the reason that children do not always voluntarily agree to provide assistance to their parents, even if the parents fulfilled their reciprocal responsibilities towards the children in full. In this case, the parent or both parents have the right to apply to the court with a corresponding application. Based on the results of the consideration, the court itself will establish in fixed monetary terms the monthly amount that the children or one child will have to pay to the parents.
Child support for parents: judicial practice from an expert
In 2010, citizen B. exercised the legal right to file a claim in court against her adult son A. to collect 10 thousand rubles from him monthly for her maintenance. To substantiate her claims, the citizen indicated that she is not just his mother, but also a pensioner and a disabled person of group 2-1, and also suffers from various diseases and needs care and the purchase of medicines. At the same time, her only income is an old-age pension, and her son refuses to voluntarily help her. The defendant did not appear at the court hearing and did not admit the claims. At the same time, the magistrate refused to satisfy citizen B.’s claim.
Having checked the case materials and considered the arguments set out in the supervisory appeal, the supervisory court found the court decisions subject to cancellation on the following grounds:
- the court did not take into account the provisions of the Constitution of the Russian Federation, which establish the unconditional and primary duty of adult able-bodied children to provide for their disabled parents in need. In addition, the financial situation and family circumstances of the children do not matter, since the transfer of alimony is within the scope of their constitutional responsibilities;
- the court did not allow the parties to discuss the issue of the relationship between the plaintiff’s needs and her income: the fact that citizen B. has a pension and also enjoys periodic support from the state due to disability does not serve as a reason for refusing her alimony.
Taking into account the above, B.’s civil case was sent for a new trial with a different composition of judges. As a result, the claim for alimony was satisfied.
Parents' spending needs.
When assigning payments by children in favor of their parents, the court calculates them from the number of children who jointly and severally bear the obligation to support their parents. If the parents subsequently refuse financial assistance from one or more children, the amount of payments will be reduced by the amounts that were payable by these children. For example, a mother has 4 children, and in her application she asks to collect maintenance from only 3. The court determines the amount necessary to support the mother and divides it by the total number of children, i.e. by 4. Afterwards, from the total amount, the amount due for payment by one child, for whom no claims were made, is subtracted, and the resulting difference will be that which is due to the mother as monthly maintenance. And the remaining 3 children will pay it in equal amounts.
This means that only one of the existing children, for example, should not provide assistance. The responsibility to support parents is assigned to all their existing offspring equally.
Caring for aging parents with aggressive outbursts
- You need to know the reasons for parental abusive behavior. You can only find out the reasons through a medical examination or consultation with a professional doctor. Then you will know for sure whether your parent has Alzheimer's disease or whether he is unhappy in your home and is very worried about the death of his spouse.
- In any situation, remain calm and try not to overreact to your parents’ behavior. The worst thing you can do is react emotionally to insults. Remember that these are your beloved parents. Do not shout and under no circumstances respond with mutual insults.
- When the elderly person is in a good mood, talk to him . Be honest, tell him that his behavior is ugly and it is affecting your relationship. Tell him that you love him, but also make it clear that his actions are unacceptable.
- Sometimes you should take short breaks in communication (1-2 days). Try to relax during this period, relax with your family, go to the cinema. Be alone if necessary.
- Remember that you are not alone in this problem . You can go to meetings and find out how other people deal with a similar situation. There are also volunteer organizations that can help you look after and care for a sick person.
Release of children from the obligation to support parents
Although the obligation is provided for by the RF IC regarding the maintenance of parents by children, there are cases when the law exempts them from fulfillment. The decision on the issue of release from alimony obligations is entrusted to the court and is possible in the following cases:
- The parent claiming to receive financial support from the child was deprived of his rights as a parent in relation to him. However, if the child is not against providing financial support to such a parent and does not insist in court on the refusal to satisfy the demands, but recognizes them, then the deprived parent will receive maintenance from this child in court;
- If in the past the parent evaded the alimony obligations imposed on him to support minor children, to whom counterclaims are now being made;
- If in the past a parent evaded other responsibilities assigned to him by the RF IC as a parent (did not care about comprehensive development, etc.), this also provides grounds for releasing children from the obligation to provide financial assistance to the parent.
At the same time, the parent who has regained his rights has the right to claim support from the child on a general basis.
The relationship between parents and children should first of all be based on moral norms, and only in the rarest cases on legal norms. Because it is not for nothing that they say that the family is the basis of the state, the unit of society. But what will happen to our society if people related by blood, instead of showing mutual care, respect and support, demand money from each other through the courts?
Author of the article
How to oblige children to pay child support through the court?
If the parents were unable to agree with their children on providing alimony for their maintenance, then the law provides for the collection of funds through the court. In this situation, the court determines both the degree of need for financial assistance and the amount of alimony for the maintenance of each individual parent in a fixed amount subject to monthly deductions. To do this, he correlates the income and general financial condition of the parent with the expenses that he requires to cover his needs - the purchase of food, clothing, medicines, payment of bills for housing and communal services, material rewards for caregivers and other needs - based on age , health status and other life circumstances.
When going to court, a parent must provide evidence of his need for financial support from his children, that is, the insufficiency of his own funds. This requirement is regulated by Article 56 of the Code of Civil Procedure of the Russian Federation. However, this does not mean that under any circumstances the plaintiff will be able to count on the maximum amount of financial assistance. After all, the court, in turn, is obliged to take into account the financial and marital status of the child: this requirement is set out in Part 3 of Art. 87 RF IC.
“In addition, the amount of payments is determined taking into account all of the plaintiff’s able-bodied children, regardless of whether a child support claim is brought against several children or one of them,” clarifies Ekaterina Antonova. “Other children may also be named as co-defendants in this case.”
In order to justify the required amount of alimony for monthly payments in a statement of claim for the recovery of a parent’s support, the parent must:
- Provide the court with generalized information about your monthly income from all sources (pension, social benefits, earnings, etc.);
- Indicate the amount of your monthly expenses;
- Compare the amount of your monthly income with the cost of living in the region in which the plaintiff lives.
The decision to collect parental benefits from children is made by the magistrate no later than one month from the time the parent filed the claim. According to Art. 211 of the Code of Civil Procedure of the Russian Federation, the decision is subject to immediate execution.
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